Archive for July, 2010

It’s not true that this past year has completely changed me, but it most certainly is true that I’ve stood at the threshold of complete change, that I’ve been brought to the brink of complete change.  In order to understand me — not necessarily male chastity, or submissiveness,  or anything except how those things apply to me and my life with J, you have to understand the following principles we’ve come to embrace, and, tentatively, subtly, espouse to others.  Please don’t take anything here personally or as an invitation to an argument.  I can only speak for me, and how J and I are growing in our relationship.  Also, please don’t get the idea we’ve sat around and hashed out the wording of this.  This is all merely my thinking.  A man in a cricket does a lot of thinking.

1. Women are superior to men: intellectually, physically, spiritually, emotionally.  At first this idea held only erotic attraction to me, but the more I thought about it, the more apparent it became to me, and I now consider it to be a general truth.

2. In any relationship between a man and a woman, the natural place for the man is in subservience to the woman.  In a marriage, the woman should as a general matter be acknowledged as the dominant partner, and the man’s role is to accommodate her needs and desires.

3. Orgasm control is essential for the healthy sexual expression of principles 1 and 2.   A man’s unfettered access to his own penis is cancer to his personal relationships.

4. Men are unable to control themselves regarding their own orgasm, and require a woman’s control in order to abstain from masturbating.

5. Without orgasm control, a man’s thoughts and desires are unmoored and scattered.  With it, his focus remains constant and unyielding on the goal of continually pleasing the woman who controls him.  The dynamic of orgasm control is healthy, natural and beautiful.

6. A man’s resistance to the principles set forth above is rooted in arrogance.  The current standard cultural definition of masculinity is profoundly flawed, and is a product of the insecure arrogance of men.

7.  A woman’s loving humiliation of her husband, including but not limited to the use of a chastity device, will over time act as an antidote to his arrogance.  Masculinity is an illusion waiting to be defined by you.

8.  A chastity device is a symbol of fidelity, a reminder of submissiveness, an expression of love, and a piece of decorative jewelry.   It shouldn’t be forgotten that all of this is fun and erotic and hot and beautiful and lasting and real.

TELL HER TODAY:  I did a little more than a year ago, and guess what?


(details as all this applies to us here and now to follow)


Read Full Post »

Ptathuk asks:  how does J feel about the direction our lives are taking, what if any reservations does she have, and how have I reassured her?

First, thanks so much for the comment — I get surprisingly few of them considering how many of you seem to visit here every day, but I can understand.  I don’t leave many comments on any of your blogs either.  I guess we’re all a bit shy.

J is very much her own person, as am I.  She does nothing she doesn’t want to do, and that’s as it should be.

As I’ve written before, neither of us are “scene” or “role playing” people.  We’re integrating domination, submissiveness, chastity and orgasm control into our very real, very busy and stressful lives.  There are no gasmasks or latex bodysuits anywhere near our relationship.  We’re making this up as we go along, with nothing to guide us but love, honesty and instinct.

That said, we openly accept between us the truth of female superiority, and the absolute necessity of a wife’s complete control of her husband’s orgasms.  It’s remarkable how many times in the course of our lives we hear about some guy that completely fucked up, whether it be in his marriage or personal life, and we find ourselves asking each other whether it might have been different had he been cricketed.

I’m pretty much constantly in the cricket, and as of today it’s been 33 days, with a week to go before I get to come again.   J loves keeping me locked up.

While she’s become very used to having a cock that jumps to attention for her at the drop of a hat, she’s also expressed exasperation at times at my tendency to become “clutchy” after 20 or so days in chastity.

That’s understandable:  she gets to come every day, and I’ve become accustomed to taking more sensual satisfaction in hugging, kissing and cuddling than I ever have before in my life. That can become tedious to a recipient who doesn’t have restrictions on the ability to orgasm.  I know it’s an issue, and I work on it.  The last thing I want is for her to allow me to orgasm out of a desire to be let alone.  KOOKY, I KNOW.

On another note, do you know it’s been more than a year since I’ve masturbated?  I DO.  And I’m also aware that many of you probably check in here to look at the pictures and masturbate to the idea of orgasm control.  Maybe I’m masturbating vicariously through you by posting them.  I don’t analyze it anymore.

Trying to figure out why I crave J’s sexual and personal domination, or that she keep me naked as often as possible, or that I be responsible for eating any cum I ejaculate, is a fool’s errand, and ultimately irrelevant.  What is, is.  Sex is not the enemy. If people are lucky, love finds the way, the same way a flower turns toward the sun.

Read Full Post »